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For My Almost-30 Friends

A lot of my friends are turning 30 this year and it seems to be filling them with dread. At the ripe-old-age of 31, I wanted to pass along something I have learned:

30. Is. Awesome. 

I love being 30! I approached this decade with a bit of anxiety myself: Are my ovaries dying? Am I behind in life? Am I still a desirable hire even though I'm not a tech-savvy new grad? Do I still have time to do all the things I want to do? Should I have more figured out in life? 

Funny enough this is also how I approached my 25th birthday and, now, I look back and realize I was a young babe with lots of life ahead and plenty of eggs to spare. Ah, hindsight bias! 

Something happened on my 30th birthday, though: I decided I was going to love this decade. I spent so much of my 20s worrying about whether or not I was behind on life, letting insecurity and societal standards dictate my emotional state. When I turned 30, I thought I am taking charge of this decade. I'm 30 and I'm a grown woman! 

If you are approaching 30 and are feeling anxious, I want to share a little exercise that helps me: take a minute and think back to five years ago. What were you like? How did you feel? What did you believe? How was your emotional state? How about your confidence? Take a minute to recognize and honor how far you have come in five years. Girl, you have come FAR! You have likely made major strides, learned a ton and grown more into the woman you were designed to be. This is worth celebrating!

The honest (not so thrilling) truth about 30 is this: your skin starts to change. I needed a whole new regimen of moisturizers! You have moments when you see a picture from 21 and think I look the same, right? And then see your forehead and are like nooo, no I don't. Also, sometimes I feel really confused about technology and my college ambassadors' insta game makes me feel like a granny. Like, how do they have so many followers?

But here's what I love about 30:

I feel more comfortable in my skin. I no longer pick myself apart in the mirror and, instead, recognize that this is the body that was created for me. I can either appreciate and enjoy it, or fight it. Fighting it is endlessly exhausting. 

I'm more confident in my beliefs and, on the flipside, less afraid to admit when I'm unsure about my opinions (healthcare, for example). 

I flounder less. I'm more able to speak about what I do and why it matters to me. 

I'm less afraid of saying no. I understand my own boundaries and beliefs enough to decline an invite, opportunity or engagement that doesn't align with them. This has taken me a very long time and has given me so much more freedom. 

No decade or year is all sunshine, but, if you're 29-and-a-half and 30 fills you with dread, I just want to assure you that, so far, this decade is pretty sweet. 

PS: This quote is my jam, which I found right here:

It doesn’t make sense to call ourselves ugly, because we don’t really see ourselves. We don’t watch ourselves sleeping in bed, curled up and silent with chests rising and falling with our own rhythm. We don’t see ourselves reading a book, eyes fluttering and glowing. You don’t see yourself looking at someone with love and care inside your heart. There’s no mirror in your way when you’re laughing and smiling and happiness is leaking out of you. You would know exactly how bright and beautiful you are if you saw yourself in the moments where you are truly yourself.